Film: The Strangers - Chapter 1

Now that the film list is done, I knew what I was doing today. Honestly, what was coming up on my list wasn't as interesting as what The Hideout were doing, so I joined them instead, for The Strangers: Chapter 1, at the Vue West End as usual. These films always disturb the hell out of me - but that's the point, isn't it! Ate at the adjacent Bella Italia, as usual.

Oh my, it's been too long - I always make a beast of myself with the garlic butter, and it's so possible at Bella Italia. I love the garlic butter dough balls for starter (complete with garlic butter dip), and then the chicken milanese, which comes with pourable garlic butter. Oh my, it's a garlic-fest - beware, any vampires! I'd just finished that, and the server was making unenthusiastic noises about dessert, and then our group organiser messaged to say he was already there (nearly half an hour early). Well, I was full anyway (of garlic butter).. off I went, soon as I could find someone to give me the bill.

The upstairs bar in the Vue is a lovely place to meet - but hardly ever staffed. So, this evening, downstairs again for anyone who wanted a drink, and show your ticket to get back upstairs again. Not too much hassle - and we knew the guy at the counter anyway, so it wasn't possible to be mad at him. In fact, he remembered my order, getting the wine out of the fridge as soon as he saw me in the queue! ;-) Ah, it's nice to have one's reputation precede one..

Conversation in the upstairs bar was good - if strangely divided between people discussing horror films, and people discussing.. cereal. Well, horror fans are nothing if not interesting. 

What a shame I can't say the same about the film.

Oh Lord. As I said to him when we came out, this is the greatest piece of unmitigated tripe I've ever had the misfortune to spend money on. You know, there are few enough people who can make a decent horror film. Horror fans know this. There are, on the other hand, very many "filmmakers" out there with an eye for a quick buck, who've heard that horror films draw crowds, and want a piece of the action. So they go for the lowest common denominator - plenty of jump scares, because that's the easiest way to scare people, minimal plot.

I've been spoiled - my memory of home invasion films stems from Funny Games, a truly sinister piece about a couple of young lads who terrorise a family. Someone said afterwards, well, you can't compare all home invasion films! Hah - no, you can't. That one was good - The Strangers, and anything modelled on it, is NOT. I've mentioned the near-constant jump scares - it takes our predators an awfully long time to stalk their prey. Certainly, I went to the loo, and literally nothing seemed to have happened when I got back.

Oh, and any dramatic tension in the middle of the film - when they're trying to escape - is completely nullified by that scene in the trailer, where they're tied up in chairs, asking their captors why they're doing this. "Because you're here," is, naturally, the response. My point, however, is - well, as they're running around trying to sneak out of the house, find a way out - you know they haven't been tied to chairs yet, so.. they're hardly going to escape. Oh, and spoiler - when they do, finally, get tied to the chairs? The filmmakers completely run out of ideas for things to have their captors do to them. It's singularly the least interesting incident of chair torture I have ever seen in all my days. God, I could have done better..

I have to admit - the film had one - ONE - redeeming factor; they played Nights in White Satin at one point. Which I love. So, while that was playing, I enjoyed myself..

Awful, awful, awful. Good to see people, but a dreadful waste of money. Outside afterwards, some people stayed to discuss other awful films - I gave the whole thing up and came home. Where, if anyone tries to invade, I might be able to give them a lesson in how to do it. Not from this film, though..

Tomorrow, also film - this time on my own, and I'm heading to Big Banana Feet, a documentary about Billy Connolly in action in Ireland in 1975. I love Billy Connolly.. will adore this. Closest showing is in Picturehouse Central. And the film is mid-afternoon, so I'm grabbing the time beforehand for a much-needed haircut! At last.. it's just been so hectic, I haven't had the time. Unfortunately, I'd have liked to eat in Bella Italia again, but it's completely unavailable all day - guess I'll just see what I can find, there won't be any great rush anyway.

On Sunday, back with Discover London - History Walks and Events for a walk about The Great Fire of London. I love these walks - it'll be nice to get back to one.

On Monday, last film of the week - I'm off to see Made in England: The Films of Powell and Pressburger, closest showing in The Curzon Bloomsbury. As usual, much easier to book on the app - but even that isn't without its problems, constantly telling me there's a problem with my payment method right before sending me a purchase receipt! Freaky..

On Tuesday, back for the first time since St. Patrick's Day with Buddies on a Budget (BoB) in London - we're off to The Globe for Richard III. With a woman in the title role.. could be interesting. Ah, The Globe - must be summer! And I can walk there - I've booked a table in The Anchor for dinner beforehand.

On Wednesday, for once, I'm staying in - I have a Zoom talk given by the writers of a book called Seven Myths that Changed England. Turns out it's an LSE event.. and blast it, I saw it on cheap ticket sites, but it turns out to be completely free.. actually, I might head to the in-person event instead, I'll see how I feel.

On Thursday, I'm with London Social and Cultural Meetups, first time in months - we're going to a photo exhibition at Estorick. Then I'm back to Ireland for the next bank holiday.

On the 28th, another of those cheap ticket talks - this one is by Asne Seierstad, and is at The Conduit, on the subject of Afghanistan under Taliban rule.

On the 29th, back with London Literary Walks at last - my Wednesdays are just so busy! This is a walk about Island Records - U2's old label, so of course I have an interest..

And on the 30th, back with London Hot 100 - we're at the New Wimbledon Theatre for Jimmy Carr Laughs Funny.